Brace Yourselves: School for Rich Kids Is Happening

Jonathan Cheban, a minor (seriously, minor) celebrity mostly known for being Kim Kardashian’s best friend, has revealed in an interview that he is starting a school to teach rich kids how to be rich.

Never was the term “face-palm” more appropriate. Jonathan Cheban, who apparently does more than just hang out with Kim Kardashian, he says he's working on "39 businesses," thinks it’s his duty to open up a school for rich kids, perfectly located in the Trump Tower, where they cab learn about the basics of douchery — I mean, of flaunting one’s wealth. He said in an interview, “Wealthy kids from all over the world will learn things about private aviation, social media, quality of diamonds, types of caviar, mixed in with economics and other fundamental undergrad and grad classes."

My God. How is he serious? Gathering up young rich kids is not a bad idea but instead of teaching them about caviar they should be taught about the realities of their privileged lives. They should be inspired to be humble and to give back to those who were not born as fortunate as they were. That would be a school I could get behind.

Cheban's school is definitely not that school. He says his school will teach the social skills wealthy children need to, "survive in a city like this with a lot of money. If you are buying a diamond you need to know the clarity and if you are buying a private jet you need to know the different leathers and seats.” Cheban is definitely the man to teach our nations youth. He told New You, "I’ve been working since I was a kid. I had my own company when I was 23 years old, worked with Diddy and J. Lo and Mariah and did a million events with them."

Cheban, you’re an odd, sad man. Don’t let others follow in your footsteps, please.