You remove your underwear, lie down on the floor on your carefully constructed "nest," and wait for the lubed-up fingers of your partner—or a stranger—to start lightly rubbing your clitoris.
This is orgasmic meditation—or OM-ing as its devotees call it—and it is a 15-minute wellness practice designed to instill more connection, vitality and pleasure in your life.
OM-ing isn't about climaxing more. Rather it's about being in the moment and expanding the sweet spot of orgasm.
At OneTaste—which operates OM retreats in New York City, Los Angeles and seven other U.S. cities (as well as London and Melbourne)—classes are open to couples and singles. However, if you're not already loved up and want to practice OM, its coaches recommend you bring along a friend you trust to, you know, rub your lady bits.
On a recent episode of Bustle's Honestly Though podcast, sex writer Rose Surnow spoke about her own experience with orgasmic meditation, noting that three years of practice has radically changed her sex life.
Surnow explained that OM-ing is all about helping women work through some of their blocks so they can start to enjoy sex more. She said she believes it's a game-changer for women who are used to giving sexual pleasure but not in receiving it.
On the podcast, Surnow explained how orgasmic meditation works:
First, the woman is naked from the waist down, while her partner remains clothed. The woman lies down on a specially constructed "nest," which includes a blanket and pillows for comfort.
The session commences with the lights on. There should be no candles, no "mood" music, no relaxing glasses of wine. The stroker sits on top of the woman, sets a timer, then "grounds" the woman by putting hands on her thighs. (This is done to put her at ease and make her feel less awkward about lying down pantless in a room full of strangers.)
The stroker then looks at the woman's vagina and then says something neutral like, "I notice that your labia is a pink coral color."
With a small amount of lube on their fingers (if a stranger, then on their gloves), the stroker says "I'm going to touch your pussy now." Then the light rubbing begins, lasting for 15 minutes with no specific goal.
Men are instructed to stroke their partner's clitoris with the same gentleness they would use to rub their own eyelid—often a complete change of pace for guys who have been brought up with images of aggressive and dramatic sex.
To Surnow, this is what makes OM as much a meditation-like practice as for their partners.
"They're just staring at a clitoris and they're stroking it super lightly, and it's 15 minutes, and they're totally focused," she said. "It's a revolutionary idea that something so subtle can be so deep."
This post originally appeared on Mamamia, Spring.St's Australian sister site. You can read it here.